Don’t read this if you aren’t ready to be challenged and maybe even offended.
“My husband won’t lead our home spiritually!” and, “What do you contribute to our house? You come home from work, sit in your chair, and play video games all night!”
These are two real statements I’ve heard recently from women longing for their husbands to step up to the plate.
Society often portrays fathers as lazy and emasculates them. It discourages them from fulfilling their God-given role as spiritual leaders. The culture doesn’t want you to be who God has called you to be: a man who leads your family with spiritual courage.
I get it. I’m still growing in being a man of God. This is not a legalistic, “Man up and be perfect” type of article. This is a look in the mirror and ask ourselves, are we actually leading our families? Or have we claimed leadership in our homes but left our wives and children languishing for our spiritual leadership?
In the hustle and bustle of daily life, it’s easy for fathers to overlook the immense responsibility they hold in teaching their children about the faith. In Matthew 28:18-20, we find a clear directive from Jesus Himself to teach them to obey all which I have commanded you. Christian husband and father, does the Great Commission apply to your home? Are you leading your family?
The Great Commission: A Call to Fathers
This command isn’t limited to pastors, missionaries, or church leaders. God forbid! It’s a call to every believer, including and especially fathers. The Great Commission starts at home, with your own children. You are uniquely positioned to shape their faith and guide them in understanding and living out God’s commands.
But I’m not here to guilt trip you. I’m here to challenge you and give you something you can do in faith-filled responsive obedience (maybe even repentance).
Teaching Begins at Home
Consider the following points as you take up this challenge:
Model Faith in Action
Your children learn more from your actions than your words. More is caught than taught. Show them what it means to live out your faith daily. Let them see you pray, read the Bible, and serve others.
Sadly, in our culture, even the evangelical and reformed world, mothers are the primary theological educators of their children. Men, do you model piety for your children? Not out of a show. Kids can smell the stench of hypocritical show religion. But can your children see a genuine spiritual walk with Christ they would want to model?
Incorporate Faith into Daily Life
Make discussions about faith a regular part of your family’s routine. Whether you’re driving to school, working in the yard, or sitting down for a meal, find opportunities to talk about God and His teachings.
Be Honest About Challenges
Share your struggles and doubts with your children. Let them see that faith isn’t about having all the answers, but about trusting God through all life’s ups and downs.
Your kids don’t need plastic parents. Dad, your kids need to see you fight for joy. Your daughters need to see you zealous to love your wife like Jesus loves the church. Your sons need to see you stand firm in the faith amidst the constant buffeting of life’s trials.
If you’ve gotten to this point, I’m guessing you’re serious about wanting to respond to the challenge. So, how do you do it? What’s below is just a start. It’s laying the foundation. But you’ll find as you build your household upon Jesus that there’s always more building, remodeling (reform), and even demolition (repentance) that needs to happen.
Sharing the Truth
Jesus’ command is clear: we are to teach others about Him and His teachings. This doesn’t mean forcing our beliefs on others but sharing the hope and truth we have found in Christ. As fathers, we have the responsibility to instill this truth in our children, equipping them to share their faith with others respectfully and lovingly.
Practical Steps for Fathers
Create a Spiritual Routine
Establish regular times for family devotions and prayer. This could be in the morning, at dinner, or before bed. Consistency helps children see the importance of making time for God. You’re the leader here, Dad.
Some of you may be objecting at this point. “I’ve never done this before.” “My dad didn’t do this with me.” Being the first one in the family to do this may not be easy. But if you won’t start the routine of training up your children, who will? Just do it. It doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to even happen 100% of the time. A father who will set aside time and do family devotions 3 or 4 times a week is still showing a desire to be faithful, and it will have an impact on their children.
Here’s what our family devotions look like. Now this may not work for your family. It can be criticized. It can and should be adapted for your family. But it works for our family. Critique away down in the comments. But, only if you’ve actually started trying to do family devotions. Short and sweet, 15 minutes normally. The heart can absorb what the seat can endure.
- We go over one question a week from the Westminster Shorter Catechism (maybe 3 minutes).
- We read a complete unit of thought from the Bible and work our way through books slowly. By a complete unit of thought, I mean one subheading to the next. So it may take us a few days to get through a chapter of the Bible. That’s okay. You’re not in a rush. The Lord normally gives you 18 years to do this with your kids (3 minutes).
- The kids summarize what they thought that passage was about (3 minutes).
- We sing a psalm together (3 minutes).
- We all pray – youngest to oldest – one praise or thanks and one request each. We pray for one or two families in the congregation (3 minutes).
Engage with Scripture Together
When you read the Bible together, discuss it. Encourage your children to ask questions and explore the answers together. Use resources and don’t be afraid to say, “I don’t know. I’ll research that, and we can talk tomorrow about it.”
Lead by Example
Be the first to admit when you’ve made a mistake and show how you seek God’s forgiveness and guidance. Your humility will teach your children more about God’s grace than any lecture could.
Encourage Their Faith Journey
Support your children in their own faith endeavors to pursue Jesus, whether it’s participating in church activities, doing memorization, participating in the youth group, or simply sharing what they’ve learned at Sunday school.
Dad, God has given you this opportunity to disciple your children now while they’re in your home. Become their biggest spiritual encourager. The world is trying to tear them down. Try to be there as a support for them.
Conclusion
Fathers, you play a crucial role in your children’s spiritual growth. The Great Commission begins at home. By teaching and modeling faith, you fulfill your sacred duty and leave an eternal impact on your family.
Embrace this challenge wholeheartedly. Your dedication to your children’s spiritual development will leave a lasting legacy, impacting their lives and faith for eternity. Let’s rise to the occasion and make disciples, starting with our own families.
